Fall 1997 Volume 2Number 4

LIFESTYLES

By Rip Rapose
Southern Oregon Prostate Cancer
Support Group founder

In the summer of 1992, I was like many 45-year-old men: happy, healthy (or so I thought) and working toward retirement. I met Ali that summer and we made great plans. Although I lived in Georgia and she in California, we knew we'd overcome all obstacles. Little did we know the severity of the obstacle we'd soon face.

In October 1992 I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. I naively assumed, if you're going to get cancer, prostate is the best one. I know now that prostate cancer is the second leading cause of cancer death in men. The diagnosis started me on a journey that would take me places I never dreamed of.

Unsure of my options, I decided to have surgery (radical prostatectomy) in California. I didn't think about dying. Surgery lasted only two hours, which should have been an indication that things hadn't gone well, but I was still optimistic. My optimism was dampened when I learned my prognosis. The cancer had invaded my lymph nodes. The oncologist gave me one to two years to live. Looking back, it seemed odd that I still did not focus on dying. I did feel bad for Ali, though. She was my strength during recovery, and never seemed despondent or teary-eyed. I learned later what a challenge that had been. She cried all the way to the hospital and all the way home, but never let me see her sadness.

We became aware that people were uncomfortable around someone with the "big C." They would do anything not to talk about it! At the encouragement of a medical social worker at the California hospital, Ali and I sought out a support group. It was very smallÑonly four peopleÑbut it was just what I needed. I knew I wasn't alone. We listened and learned. Ali and I looked forward to attending.

As I finished up my last term as a teacher in Georgia, I chose to take external beam radiation. I grew weary during my 37 treatments, but I never missed a day of work. My co-workers were great, but you could tell they thought I was a goner. After retiring and moving to California, I began combined hormone therapy (CHT), which is palliative and not curative, but Ali and I always felt I'd beat the odds. We've never given in.

We moved to Grants Pass in February 1994 and immediately sought a support group. We met wonderful people through the Can Survive group at Three Rivers Community Hospital & Health Center. Still, I felt the need for more male involvement. When we discovered that there was no prostate cancer group in Southern Oregon, we decided to start our own. With the help of the hospital and the American Cancer Society, Ali and I launched the Southern Oregon Prostate Cancer Support Group. We meet at 7 p.m. the second Thursday of each month in Conference Room B at the Washington campus of Three Rivers Community Hospital & Health Center. Approximately 14 people attend, and 30 are on our mailing list. Ali was adamant that women be included, and they add a lot to our group.

Ali and I were married in June 1994. I gave her the option of changing her mind, but she laughed at me, and I'm glad she did. My cancer is in remission. I owe my life to God, my wife, proper nutrition and the support of others.

Men with prostate cancer, their partners and other interested individuals are encouraged to attend the Southern Oregon Prostate Cancer Support Group. Call Rip Rapose at (541) 476-3787 for more information.